PRAISE IS BETTER THAN BLAME

Do you as a parent celebrate your child’s successes? It’s a well known fact that all of us gain a lot from our successes than from our failures. The same goes for our children too. Then why is it that a parent finds it easier to blame a child than praise him?

As a parent we assume that if we do not restrain our child then the child is spoilt. But mere restrains are futile.There must be enough outlets of satisfying activity that are approved by us. For every single thing a parent forbids the child, there should be scores of other things we allow and encourage. Otherwise, our children may grow irritable and resistant.

How do we know that our method to discipline the child has been effective?

Even after being punished or rebuked for a forbidden behavior, the child turns happily to some approved activity…then yes, our method to discipline has been

effective. And the more approved things children do with pleasure, the less prone they are to do what is not approved.

Children at the age of six, ten, sixteen are usually discouraged in various experiences at school, among friends, or because of parents. When one wish after another is denied to them, we should as parents, try hard to find hopeful, positive ways of helping him or her to get emotional relief through other outlets which bring the child satisfaction.

So provide your child a lot of hopeful and positive outlets. Imagine how happy your child is going to feel when he discovers that there are a pair of understanding wise and sympathetic parents, who give him encouragement when all the world seems to be hostile.

To achieve cooperation from your children be sure to praise him or her a lot. The mother may compliment her young daughter on her lovely conduct during a party or at her friends house. A father may express delight at breakfast table over the way their son has been getting ready for school promptly, or for helping with the house cleaning chore.

Always remember never to mention the bad behavior of the child, only the good behavior should be picked out for comment. When you hear any nice things about them at school, be sure to mention it to your child. Now surely you may ask this question “won't it make my child conceited when praised so much?” It will…only if we praise them for traits not won by their own efforts..like beautiful face or lovely skin”. Rather, we should pick out praise specific instances of good conduct, in which the child has done with effort what we consider meritorious.

Build your children on their strengths rather than on their weaknesses.

And blessed are those children whose parents, and those who guide them, celebrate their successes.

Ms Hema