The day–by-day and year-by- year companionship with your children will live on and on in them. So much so that we can still recall our loving moments with our children and even our grandchildren. Trying going to your own past, and recall the moments with your parents and grandparents. Are you giving such fine moment to your children?
Its best to remember that in everyday guidance of our children, both parents are equally necessary if these children are to develop best and it is very important that they plan together as a team when it comes to their children’s needs.
In this busy life, it’s a known fact that some fathers, unfortunately, because of the nature of their work, cannot spend nearly so much time with their growing children as they would like to spend. It should be noted that it is NOT the amount of time that counts, but the way the time available is spent and the relationship of the father to the children during this precious time.
Try to spend a reasonable amount of leisure time with your children. Include the mother too in this. As you and she enjoy each other’s company, plan maters concerning the needs of the home, the expenditure, etc in bringing up the children. This way you would have laid a healthy foundation for cultivating a cooperative family life.
To be a good father is to be a good husband. You cannot possibly cultivate a good relation with your children without also cultivating a good relation with their mother. See to it that you give their mother due regard for her as a person and observe towards her the niceties of social grace making her feel that what she does for the family is worthwhile.
You and your wife, should talk over your individual ideas about guidance of the children, when the children are not present. If you feel that she is too lenient with the youngsters and you might want her to be stricter. Then relax and be careful not to criticize her in the children’s presence. Talk this out with her.
When your child is a baby, learn to share in his physical care, keeping him for short periods while the mother gets her relaxation. When you come home from your work, you may be tired but remember, so may the mother. All day with one or several young children is a severe strain on the nerves. You can choose this time reading to your child, listening to his experiences of the day, answering his questions, enjoying his creations and inventions, making things with him, or planning a game with his friends on weekends.
Its is quite possible for you to find these experiences with your child a means of relaxation and enjoyment rather than a burden. It all depends on your point of view and the values you place on such relationships.
The father who can play cricket for the boys or toys with the girls sets the stage for vigorous group play in the neighbourhood and also renders invaluable service. It is a great art to be sympathetic, understanding, attentive to what the child tells you at different stages of his life. He will definitely talk about his experiences, joys or sorrows. It might seem too trivial for you to hear this out but it is of great importance to him. Don’t try to make fun of anything he asks or says, but instead treat him with deep regard as a person. And continually make him feel, “My Dad understands.”
When treated this way, the child will naturally ask you about any matter, which deeply concerns him. This is especially important during adolescence and during his youth. He will have the confidence to come to you for information and advice at any time. Try to help your children enjoy achievement within the range of his ability. Find out what he can do well at home, at school or on the play ground. If he is slow at books and better in doing things with his hands, help him out. See to it that he finds ways to be happy with other children of his age. Build on his successes. When he lags at school, don’t dwell on his failures. Help him to cultivate regular habits and for this see to it that you have regular habits as a parent.
